Our chemistry is electric
We are so connected
I like to turn you on
And interact all night
Charlotte Cullen, 22, UK
It has been a on off relationship with you for 9 years. It feels like more? I guess when we first started out, I only ever used you for playing dress up games.
Now, I find myself hanging out with you for hours on end, using you to talk to other people and post pretty photos and endlessly search twin peaks trivia (which may I add, I am thankful to you for showing me!)
In a way, I wish I hadn’t met you. It makes life a little bit harder, where I can’t avoid certain people or see things I wouldn’t want to witness or read. Making both women and men feel the need to change themselves and conform to what the internet feels is ‘perfect’
On the other hand, you have opened my eyes to new things-new friends, new art, media, allowing me access to buy things on the web without me leaving my bed, and for that I thank you.
For now, internet, I would like you stay. You’re not too bad. I will always hate to love you.
Olivia, 19, Kent
You’ve always been there for me, cyberspace. Through good times, and bad. I can’t really remember a time without you, which is pretty scary as I did a hell of a lot of travelling before meeting you, but none of that matters now really as I can look up, on Google, all of the places I apparently went to as a child.
I met my IRL boyfriend on your servers, and I’ve never been happier :) <3
But back to URL, you’ve been my advisory doctor, my dj and raconteur. I can find anything I need amongst your ever growing number of pages, without ever needing to move from my desk. Some people say that I’m addicted, but what do they know?
I’ve learnt more about aliens and people than I ever could by walking the streets. I will always love you, internet, even when you’re down.
Muchos besos (Thanks, google translate!)
Tom, 22, UK
Relationship length: 10 years, only really serious though for the last 6 though.
You are a thing of unfathomable beauty,
I love you dearly,
You taught me almost everything I know and showed me almost everything I adore,
I wake up to you every day
and fall asleep with you every night,
never wondering if you will desert me,
never fearing you will have found another.
you are wondrous in your complexity and scope,
you are glorious in your accessibility and inclusion.
I will love you until the day I die,
unless I have to pay more than £14.99 a month, in which case I’m out.
Sarah, 23, Glasgow
…longer than I can remember and counting <3
i wrote this in 2007 while killing time w/o webz to the tune of ‘t-pain - i’m in luv with a stripper’ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKcr5vkOxNs)
it’s every nerds dream, to steal somebodies net
refreshin network list, that’s what you call a hobby spent
see, i can view the networks, but they all gots them locks
i try my hacking skills and all i get is signals dropped
but i cant even lie, i need to get online
i can’t just read a book, aint nothing like a webz hook.
before it never tricked, but then i lost my rich.
there aint a signal i can get….
i’m in love with the innetttttt
she droppin she stoppin she blockin
i’m in love with the innettt
she trickin & dippin &splittin
&i’m not goin no where, webz, i’m stayin.
When I first discovered you - you were only dial-up and you caused wars between me and my siblings when someone wanted to use the phone line! (yes we did have to choose back then). But from the beginning you were a comfort to me - I realised I wasn’t alone. I spent hours downloading amazing bootleg recordings from Napster, meeting other people like me and it was the first time I realised I had a place in the world.
My first ever long term relationship was thanks to you dear internet- I found someone who liked the same strange taste in music as me, that was a beautiful girl (Im a lesbian) - which was a minor miracle at the time! You helped me feel comfortable with my sexuality!
You also got me into online gaming. Oh dear but OH YES! After 7 years of online gaming - I am still at it. I have spent years of my life exploring entire worlds, conquering armies, playing with magic and fulfilling my every childhood fantasy - wow I really cant thank you enough for that! I have been an elf, a troll, a bounty hunter in Star Wars and even a hobbit in Lord of the Rings. I have travelled across time and universes and rediscovered my inner GEEEK. You are the best time-waster and escapism ever!
Last but not least, thank you internet for connecting me to so many inspiring people through my work with Storm in a Teacup. I never thought that I could reach so many people and make such a difference to Feminism. I am indebted to you and all my followers.
THANK YOU tinternet!
Storm in a Teacup Collective
Our six year old relationship have only grown stronger and stronger by the years… I don’t know how to say this, and trust me, i’ve said a lot to you…
…I love you.
Also I made you this drawing.
- Ivan, Sweden
Honey, baby, sugarplum,
I love the way you lie on my stomach all day while I lazily shovel chocolate buttons into me gob and speckle you with flecks of melty chocolate in the process (sorry). I always miss you when you’re gone, I miss your quirks - your Twin Peaks screencaps and bizarre net art and gripping crossover fanfiction pairing up Sherlock characters with the hosts of 90s children’s game show hosts (I ship Moriarty and Pat Sharp, the ultimate OTP). Being without these things for too long (more than 3.7 minutes) is an agony that I cannot and will not cope with. Please be mine always, wrap me up with warm laptop glow, and may the darkness we share in this bedroom turn my skin translucent underneath the Doctor Who temporary tattoos that cover my entire body.
Lil Ashton, 21, London.
8 and a half years of passion